after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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