My friends, they love my intelligence
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
