Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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