Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
