Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Randomize
