You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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