If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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