you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Watching her eat just hurts me
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues