dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
why do cheetos always look like penises
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
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