office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?