Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
