ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
