I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize