forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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