LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize