Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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