you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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