Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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