YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
foreskin is a definite game changer
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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