4 words: hood of his car
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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