So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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