Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
