In the future we'll all be gay
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
