Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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