I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Randomize
