like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
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