I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize