you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
