My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
