I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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