The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
