Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
