she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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