Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just found puke in my bra..
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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