im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
