That's intense
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize
