I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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