Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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