i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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