Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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