I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
