at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize