On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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