I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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