I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
