Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
