Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
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you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
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I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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