Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
