She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
