pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
