I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
