absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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