remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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